Modern Dating Trends Backed By Hard Data

These days, everyone seems to have their own preconceived notions on modern dating trends and the current state of romance. Quite often, these notions are based on anecdotal evidence and may be influenced by what side of the generation divide(s) an individual is on.

Some say dating apps are the death knell of romance, specifically old-fashioned romance; others say they are fueling the asphyxiating hookup culture; and yet others opine chivalry is dead. If a position is true or false may well depend on the composition of one’s social circle, but more often than not, that hardly reflects the state of things in the wider society.

About this study

And that’s where studies like this help shed light and clear up some misconceptions. Technology certainly has affected the dating microcosm indelibly, but it also has improved our ability to collate opinions from a wider subset of the population.

The dating site (and app) Zoosk in the spirit of Valentines sought to have a data-backed understanding of the meaning of love and romance in today’s world; and what better way to do so than to survey 9,000 members; and sort through data from 200,000 messages and 750,000 profiles.

Let’s just say, regardless of what you think of contemporary romance, you’d do well to read on with an open mind—they’re all stats and info generated from an extensive study. Here are the key takeaways:

Modern romance vs Old-fashioned romance

• When asked to identify their preference between old-fashioned romance and modern romance, majority (82%) of those polled preferred old-fashioned romance to modern romance. It appears old is still gold in the world of romance.
• Is chivalry dead? 79% of those surveyed didn’t think so. When categorized by gender, an interesting detail comes to light. A higher percentage (31%) of women think chivalry is dead compared to men (17%).

Are traditional romantic gestures history?

It turns out the answer is a huge, emphatic no: as most people still find dating traditions romantic.

• 95% felt that holding a door open on a date is romantic
• 93% thought that public displays of affection are romantic
• 82% pointed out that paying for your date is romantic

Who wants what?

• The survey found that men and women didn’t express and feel love through the same ways. Like that was supposed to be a surprise?

When given the choice of five options people found most romantic, the result was that 60% of men preferred physical touch. Women didn’t tilt majorly to one end with 39% preferring quality time and 34% preferring physical touch.

• The top 3 gestures women found romantic were romantic getaway (70%), offering support and encouragement (69%), and hugs or kisses to say thank you (66%).
• The top 3 gestures men found romantic were hugs or kisses to say thank you (74%), offering support and encouragement (69%), and caring for you when you’re sick (50%).
• The top 3 gifts women found romantic were tickets to an event (61%), flowers (54%), and a framed photo of the two of you (51%).
• The top 3 gifts men found romantic were a framed photo of the two of you (54%), tickets to an event (51%), and cologne (21%).

Spice up your romantic life

Generate more interest

As anyone would agree, words are just as powerful as gestures in romance. In figuring out what words generated more traffic (inbound messages), the study discovered that including ‘romantic’ in a dating profile increased inbound messages by 24%. Astoundingly, tweaking that to ‘hopeless romantic’ led to a 38% increase in inbound messages.

The top five terms to use on your online dating profile to spark more engagement are flowers (52% increase), romance (41%), hopeless romantic (38%), romantic (24%), and old-fashioned (16%).

Memorable date ideas

There is no reason why a romantic date has to be outlandish to hit the right note. In fact, 75% of daters say the most romantic date is snuggling in front of the fireplace. The two other top ideas are candlelight dinners (58%) and a picnic in the park (45%).

Among women and millennials, eccentric options came to light. 46% of women mentioned that a scenic drive was a good date idea, while 60% of millennials said the most romantic is stargazing.

Couples who inspire relationship goals

• The top 3 romantic TV couples were Full House Uncle Jesse and Aunt Becky, I Love Lucy Lucy and Ricky, and Friends Chandler and Monica.

Grey’s Anatomy Meredith and Derek was a popular couple amongst women, while Boy Meets World Cory and Topanga and The Office Jim and Pam were top couples for millennials.

• The top 3 romantic movie couples were Ghost’s Molly and Sam, Titanic’s Jack and Rose, and The Notebook’s Noah and Allie.

Millennials adored Star Wars couple Han Solo and Princess Leia.

• Moving on from fiction, the top 3 romantic real-life couples were Faith Hill and Tim McGraw, Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell, and Michelle and Barack Obama